Before launching into the “How To” of finding and embracing your wedding style, I want to give you a real wedding example of what this can look like!
An Epic Example of Personal Style at Tami & Ian's Burbank CA Wedding.
Here's the perfect example of what making your wedding day your own can look like! Tami and Ian had some traditions they wanted to keep while throwing out others. The result was a beautiful and memorable Calamigos Los Angeles Wedding that genuinely felt like a celebration of these two wonderful, fun, and kind humans. (Seriously, this wedding was an absolute blast from planning to the end).
Their most noticeable non-traditional element was placing their wedding party in all-white attire. What did the bride and groom opt to wear? Tami decided on a gorgeous backless black gown, while Ian chose an all-black suit for the ceremony. Were there wardrobe changes? Hell yes. For their reception, the bride changed into a black suit with gold accents, and the groom switched to a traditional Scottish kilt.
The venue served as a pleasant departure from the usual craziness of Los Angeles, offering picturesque and serene surroundings. The space provided a garden aesthetic for the ceremony complete with a waterfall backdrop. And for the reception, the bride and groom added details such as dried floral arrangements, tea lights, and personal photos to enhance the elegant Equestrian Ballroom and make the space feel like their own.
The end-of-evening elements also included a uniquely curated playlist with artists such as System of the Down (they know their guests, the dance floor was packed), an impressive sweets table with delicious gluten-free treats, and time devoted to light painting (a hobby the groom is incredibly passionate about).
Tami and Ian knew what they liked as a couple and embraced it! They didn't follow traditional elements just for the sake of tradition.
As a planner, I sometimes see couples struggling with this personal aspect of planning. Torn between what they feel they should be doing and what they actually want to do.
Here are some steps to help you achieve the wedding look and style that feels right for you:
1. Wedding Etiquette Be Damned!
So, what is wedding etiquette exactly? You may have heard this term before, but it essentially means what is wedding expectations. These expectations range from the beginning to end of the wedding planning process, from guest list to attire, to timeline, and so forth.
I'm all for wedding etiquette as a starting point. And while it can help couples establish where to begin and serve as a general outline for what needs to get done, don't be afraid to delineate from these traditions.
Wedding etiquette is perfect for broad guidance, but don't feel held hostage. Certain expectations can place significant pressure on you to follow through with elements you'd rather not adhere to.
Remember that your friends and family aren't there for “common” wedding practices; they're there for you. And the most memorable weddings I've helped plan or attended as a guest are those that you walk into the space and think, "Ah, this feels so them!" That's the lasting impression that guests will have for years to come. Not specifically what traditions you did or did not include.
2. Find Vendors that Align with your Style
Vendors are there to help you. They're meant to support your vision, so hire a team that compliments your style.
When searching for vendors, you should already be looking for those that check the essential boxes: good communicators with solid portfolios, many happy past clients, and positive reviews.
However, remember that these vendors will be present on one of the most personal days of your life. You want people there that are not only professional but that you feel comfortable with, and this includes finding vendors that understand your style.
Before booking, take advantage of consultations. Hop on a call with them to discuss what you envision for your big day. And then, from there, go with your gut. Are they a good fit? Do you feel a genuine connection with them?
Finding vendors that align with your style and vision will elevate your wedding experience!
3. Don't Think About Your Style in Terms of Wedding Planning
This sounds… counterintuitive, right?
Well, another stress point for couples when it comes to thinking about style, is trying to immediately make a connection between your style and your wedding. This connection doesn't always happen right away.
Take a step back. Think about what you like and your vibe without applying it directly to your wedding.
What do you and your fiance both like to do?
What do your date nights look like?
What are some things you have in common that make you feel close to one another?
Do you have shared interests or favorites?
Scale out and take a deep breath. If you approach your wedding style from a different angle, you'll likely stumble on answers and solutions without even trying.
So What Does This All Mean?
There are no definitive rules or regulations your must follow when it comes to planning your wedding. That is, aside from the delicately placed restrictions from your County Clerk's Office needed to obtain your marriage license or those put in place contractually by venues/vendors (be sure to follow those rules!). Stick with the concepts and elements you like and disregard the rest!
The bottom line is that no two couples are the same, which means wedding planning will look different for everyone. Every couple has its own unique love story, way of doing things, and style. Because of this, your wedding should be a reflection of who you are, not the other way around.
Shout out to Tami and Ian's Vendor Team:
Bakery: @thecaker
Photo Booth @magicaleventsbyyami
Photography: @simile_photography
Planner: @dearestanddarlingevents
Rentals / Yard Games: #gigantogamerentals
Venue / Catering / Bar: @calamigoslosangeles
For more stunning and badass photos from Tami and Ian's wedding, head over to their photographer's blog post (Similar Photography): Calamigos Los Angeles Wedding in Burbank, CA | Tami & Ian — Simile Photography
✨The Wedding Budget Roadmap✨
Also, grab a copy of The Wedding Budget Roadmap (with Budget Checklist) HERE! This step-by-step guide will help you and your partner navigate the financial aspects of wedding planning with confidence and ease.